Letters to Serena, Part 3: Christian Love and Identity – Becoming the Woman You’re Meant to Be

Who You Must Be to Attract True Love

After writing to you about identity and then love, Serena, there’s still one more truth I must share—perhaps the most important of all. Because love like the one we dream of doesn’t come by accident. To walk in love that is patient, faithful, and true, we must also become people who live from that same place.

This final letter is about Christian love and identity—about who you must become to welcome the love your heart truly longs for. This is not about perfection, but about intention. Not about performance, but about presence.

So here it is, my darling. The final note in this series—but never the final word in your journey.

My dear Serena,

“She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.” – Proverbs 31:25

Love like this does not come by chance. To meet someone who sees your soul, honours your heart, and walks in patience, you must also be someone who lives from that place of quiet strength and grace.

You do not need to strive, to dazzle, to perform. You simply need to become more of who you truly are.

Be the kind of woman who knows her worth, not because of what others say, but because she walks with the One who made her.

A woman who cultivates peace in her heart, who knows how to sit with her own thoughts and listen to the whispers of God.

Be someone who lives with intention. Who does not rush into affection just to feel seen, but who waits for the kind of love that sees all of her, and stays.

Be a friend first. Practice kindness, curiosity, and depth in your relationships. Speak truth, even when it trembles on your lips. Let your standards be a reflection of your values, not your fears.

Most of all, be the kind of woman who knows that love is not a rescue mission—it is a journey walked by two whole people, each offering their best, even in their imperfection.

When you are rooted in who you are and Whose you are, you will not need to chase love. The right heart will recognize yours by the way you are.

So walk steadily, my Darling. Grow strong in Spirit and soft in heart. The love you seek will find you on the path of becoming.

What It Means to Walk in Christian Love and Identity

 “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” – Proverbs 4:23

To walk in Christian love and identity is to live from the quiet confidence that you are deeply known and unconditionally loved by God. It is to root your sense of worth not in fleeting opinions or surface beauty, but in the eternal truth that you are His beloved.

This identity shapes how you see yourself and how you love others, not with desperation, but with dignity. It teaches you to be gentle yet strong, open yet discerning, humble yet anchored in truth.

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

When you know who you are in Christ, you no longer chase after love to fill a void; you offer love from a heart already filled.

This is the kind of woman you are becoming, Serena.

And this is what prepares you to both give and receive a love that reflects the very heart of God.

✨ Shakespeare Whispers: A Summary from the Bard

Before we part, Serena, let me leave you with two gentle truths from Shakespeare — a playwright who saw right into the human heart, in all its mess, longing, and wonder.

“To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.” – Hamlet, Act I, Scene III

This one always gets me.

It doesn’t say: “Be impressive.”

It doesn’t say: “Be lovable.”

It simply says: Be true.

Because when you’re rooted in who God made you to be — not bending to fit, not shrinking to please — you’ll attract people who love you in truth, not illusion.

God can’t bless who you pretend to be. And I know this as a fact!

But He can abundantly bless the one you are — even in progress, even unsure, even healing.

“They do not love that do not show their love.”– Two Gentlemen of Verona

Now, this one is a little cheeky. But real.

Because love is not just feelings and fireworks.

It’s actions.

It's kindness.

It's someone showing up, not just texting “wyd.”

It's the guy who brings you soup when you're sick — not the one who says, “you're strong, you’ll be fine.”

Words are nice. But fruits are better.

So, dearest Serena —

Be a woman who is true, not performative.

Watch for the ones who show care, not just charm.

And above all, remember: you’re not waiting to be chosen — you already are.

But to walk in that truth, you must first choose yourself — in love, in dignity, in grace.

Love and respect yourself enough to reject the lies the world whispers:

that you are not enough, that you must become someone else to be loved.

Because the truth is, you are already deeply seen and fully known — by the One who made you.

With all my love,

Grandma

🌸 P.S. Though Letters to Serena: Faith and True Intimacy are written in the form of a letter to a granddaughter, they are meant for every young woman seeking love that is true, tender, and rooted in faith. The style is a creative choice to offer warmth, wisdom, and a personal tone—but the message belongs to you, wherever you are on your journey.

🌸 The name Serena was chosen with care. It comes from the Latin serenus, meaning calm, clear, and peaceful—qualities that blossom in a soul rooted in love and faith.

Serena is also linked to the cosmos flower, a delicate bloom symbolizing harmony, balance, and beauty in the midst of chaos. In naming this series after her, I wanted to speak not only to one girl—but to every soul seeking peace in who they are, and courage in who they’re becoming.

💌 Perhaps you know a Serena of your own—someone who could use a letter like this. Feel free to share with her this tender letter on becoming the woman God made you to be—strong, rooted in faith, and ready for real love. Let her discover what it takes to attract real love by embracing your Christian identity, rooted in faith, strength, and authenticity. A letter every woman needs.

🌸This is the final letter in the Letters to Serena series. If you’d like to start from the beginning, visit Part 1: To Be or Not to Be.

Or revisit Part 2: On Love, Intimacy, and True Romance for the reflections on true connection and wisdom in love.

💛🌼💛 May these words be a blessing. If they spoke to your heart, you might pass the blessing forward by sharing Letters to Serena: Faith and True Intimacy.💛