Letters to Serena, Part 2: Faith and True Intimacy – A Grandmother’s Words on Love
- Beata
- May 27
- 5 min read
Updated: Jun 16
What Real Love Looks Like: Faith and True Intimacy Over Romance Alone
When I laid the pen down after writing that note, I thought, perhaps it’s not the last thing she’ll need from me. Maybe, someday, when her heart begins to beat differently—when love and longing come knocking—she’ll need something more. Something quieter than rules, but louder than silence. So I wrote on. Not from worry, but from a place of deep love and the lessons time has taught me. I wanted her to have something to return to—words that might stand beside her when I can no longer.
💛🌼My Dearest Serena,
I see you standing at the doorway of love, eyes full of dreams, heart eager to leap. And I know you long for a grand love, a love that sets the world alight. That is good and beautiful, but before you run, let me tell you a secret: true intimacy does not begin in a kiss, nor does it end at an altar.
It begins with knowing and being known.
The world will tell you that love is all spark, all passion, all heady romance. But my darling, if you build a fire without first laying down the wood, it will burn bright for a moment, then vanish. Real love, the kind worth waiting for, is built slowly, with care, with wisdom.
So, let me give you three truths about love that you must hold close to your heart.
💛Love is First Friendship
If a young man rushes to capture your hand before he has sought to understand your heart, be wary.
A heart worth cherishing cannot be won in haste.
Love that lasts first walks the road of friendship—learning each other’s thoughts, laughing over simple joys, and discovering how the other sees the world.
Do not give your heart to someone who does not first delight your mind. A man who cannot share in your laughter, who does not ask about your dreams, who does not value you beyond what he can take from you, is not a man who will cherish you for a lifetime.
"A friend is one that knows you as you are, understands where you have been, accepts what you have become, and still, gently allows you to grow." – William Shakespeare
"A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity." – Proverbs 17:17
💛💛 Faith and True Intimacy is Not Physical First—It is Soul-Deep
Faith and true intimacy are not found in fleeting passion, but in slow-growing love that sees the soul and honours the heart.
The world confuses intimacy with closeness of bodies, but real intimacy is the closeness of souls.
If a man does not take the time to understand the thoughts that weigh on your heart, if he does not see you in your quietest moments and love you there, he has not earned the right to anything more.
Be with someone who values you as a whole person. Someone who speaks kindness when you are weary, who respects your boundaries not because he must, but because he honours you. Someone who, when he holds your hand, knows he holds a treasure, not a possession.
"Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, and therefore is winged Cupid painted blind." – William Shakespeare (A Midsummer Night’s Dream)
"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins." – 1 Peter 4:8
💛💛💛 Courtship is Not Old-Fashioned – It is Love With Purpose
They will tell you that waiting, that wisdom, that slow-growing love is old-fashioned. They will laugh at the idea of courtship, as if it is a dusty relic of the past. But I tell you this:
courtship is not about restriction—it is about intention.
A man who courts you is not merely passing the time; he is preparing his heart to love you rightly. He does not treat you as entertainment but as a woman worth honouring. He will not rush intimacy, because he knows love is more than just feelings—it is a choice, a covenant, a lifelong promise.
So, do not settle for a love that is hurried, for a man who only sees the surface of you. Wait for the one who walks beside you, who prays with you, who seeks to know your heart before he ever seeks your hand.
"They do not love that do not show their love." – William Shakespeare (Two Gentlemen of Verona)
"Do everything in love." – 1 Corinthians 16:14
Here are some more words from C.S. Lewis to reflect on:
"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements… Lock it up safe… But in that casket—safe, dark, motionless, airless—it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable."
Serena, maybe this Prayer for Wisdom in Love will be useful for you:
Lord, guide my heart in wisdom and patience. Help me to see love not as the world sees it, but as You designed it. Grant me discernment to recognize what is true, and the courage to wait for a love that reflects Your goodness. Amen.
Ask yourself, Serena:
Do you see love as something to get or something to give?
Are you seeking someone who makes you feel desired, or someone who makes you feel truly known?
💛🌼💛With all my love,
Grandma
Faith and True Intimacy
💛🌼P.S. Though Letters to Serena: Faith and True Intimacy are written in the form of a letter to a granddaughter, they are meant for every young woman seeking love that is true, tender, and rooted in faith. The style is a creative choice to offer warmth, wisdom, and a personal tone—but the message belongs to you, wherever you are on your journey.
💛🌼The name Serena was chosen with care. It comes from the Latin serenus, meaning calm, clear, and peaceful—qualities that blossom in a soul rooted in love and faith.
Serena is also associated with the cosmos flower, a delicate bloom that symbolizes harmony, balance, and beauty amidst chaos.
In naming this series after her, I wanted to speak not only to one girl—but to every soul seeking peace in who they are, and courage in who they’re becoming.
Comments